1/26/35
That is one night I do not wish to repeat ever again.

After the last disastrous mission we endured, Swift decided that a bit of steak and spirits was needed to patch things up. So there we all were once again, with food and drink aplenty. Everyone was having one of those subdued fun times. The kind where you know you're supposed to have uninhibited fun, but you can't because you're too inhibited.

Via was there too. I took a moment to chat her up, try to get a read on her real motives for joining this not-so-merry band. I think my line of questioning surprised her. So much so that, in her need to have a dramatic last word, she cut through her subterfuge in order to draw upon her real self. I would never trust her completely, but I think she believes in the rebellion and what Swift stands for.

By this time, I was feeling weak, sick to the stomach, and my paws were trembling slightly. I was grateful to regain my seat and exerted a mighty effort to focus on what was going on around me. A pain had started to develop in my chest which then began to radiate outward. I gripped the arms of chair and tried to not yelp. Frak, it felt like my veins were on fire. Dash and Grexi were on either side of me, but neither seemed to notice how much pain I was in.

Meanwhile, Swift was talking. I caught the occasional word. Jedi. Force. Imperials. That was about it. Then Damaria got up and started talking too, but I didn't hear a word of it. I was fighting to hard not to blackout. Then as the pain reached up into my head, things really started to swim. I got to my feet and tried to make it outside but the exertion was too much. I suppose standing forced my heart rate up, which pumped blood through my body a bit quicker which doubled the pain. (Hmmm. “Worst pain possible” x 2 = ???)

Suddenly my limbs are flailing out. I'm landing on my face and foam is creeping up my oesophagus and out my mouth. Not my proudest moment. Oh, and someone is screaming. I don't know who it is, but someone should help them. It sounds like they are being killed, very, very slowly. Oh, that's me? Well, I guess that makes sense.

I'm thrashing about wildly on the floor. (So glad I took my shock gloves off to eat. They would have definitely smashed on that stone floor. Much better to let my knuckles take the damage than my equipment.) The shock gloves make me think of Sprend for a moment. Then a moment later, there's a new kind of shocking sensation. Then blackness. At last. I thought it would never come.

My mind swims around in the ink. Occasionally it drifts near the surface. Beyond the cool liquid of my stupor I see the roof of the vibro-van. (There was a jolt, and someone from the front asked if he was alright.) There's a dark room and a hard surface beneath me. (A foreign voice is talking about how difficult it would be to save him.)

I see a candle burning. I say “see” but you know how dreams are, right? How you can see something without really “seeing” it. You just know it, you're aware of it, but your brain is such a stickler for rules, it says “You have to see something to know it's there” so it translates your dream experience of something as seeing it. I digress.

I know of a candle, and it's almost burned out. I guess the oxygen in the room is almost out or something. I hear a generator whir and hum and then fall silent. People are swearing and tempers flare. These people really want the machine to work so the candle won't die. The flame continues to get weaker as they try the machine again. This time the engine really runs for a moment before sputtering and clunking out. The flame is hardly more than an ember now.

Then there's a new voice. It's authoritative and persuasive. It tells the machine to work and it has to obey. It begins to surge and pulse with life. Then just as steadily, the flame begins to surge and pulse with life. The glow of the light slowly but steadily get stronger with each passing minute.

I surface from the black ink with tremendous gasp. My eyes flash on my surroundings: some kind of medical facility, glowing with alien technology. There are people all around, and tubes plugged into me. Just before I slide back under, I see Merlyn's face and I feel relief. My last thought before passing out again was, “He did it.”

I've spent the last couple days under Merlyn's supervision. I'm sure he recognizes me, but if he does, he hasn't said anything about the incident yet. I'm sure it's coming though.

Via stopped by yesterday for a chat. She expressed concern for my well being, then tried firing her blaster at me. I still don't understand women.

The whole gang stopped by the other day to check on my recovery. Sprend expressed concern over my staying at the Den. Thought someone might try to attack me again. It was very adorable. He's always surprising me.



1/28/35
Merlyn said I was well enough to move around outside today. I ventured back into the sunlight and discovered I wasn't that far from the Shuftsbar Training Facility. I was feeling pretty good, so I decided to pop in for a bit of a workout.

Don't get me wrong. That toxin was like liquid hell in my veins. But also must have served as some kind of mega-purge. My body feels so much lighter and agile. When my heart gets racing, I almost feel like I'm floating in the air a bit. It's exhilarating.

Naturally, I overdid it and dragged myself back to the medical bay. Merlyn's face was all shades of angry when he saw me collapse back into my bed. He came over and demanded to know what I had been doing and started calling me reckless and stupid and on and on. I tried to placate him, but I guess the dam finally broke and all the questions he had been choking back finally came gushing out.

He wanted to know how I found his warehouse, what I was doing there the other day and why I had done what I had done. I shrugged and told him most of those questions were irrelevant. What really mattered was the end result. He was still quite flabbergasted. He stammered, trying to figure out which question he really wanted answered next. I could read the confusion and concern in his eyes so I held up a paw and tried to give him the best answer I could. “Sometimes you just have to trust the people you're with.”

He opened his mouth again, wanting to say more, but no words came out. Finally, he turned and stalked away, muttering under his breath. I adjusted myself in my bed, lay back and closed my eyes. I felt like I was ready to sleep for a week.

1/29/35

Merlyn seems to have regained his composure today. At least he's talking to me again, though he avoids eye contact at all cost.

This afternoon, while he was taking my vital signs, I told him it was Maeka who led gave me his location. He seemed genuinely surprised. Turns out Merlyn had some intel on Maeka that Maeka didn't want spread around. Merlyn thought they had an understanding on what that kind of silence cost. But if Maeka wanted to blab about Merlyn's secret warehouse… So Merlyn started to tell me all kinds of things about Maeka that I didn't know, and then I told him some other things and soon we were sharing all kind of juicy intel tidbits.

I think that might have patched up any doubts he had about me. Didn't hurt me too much either.

Brown Fox gains: Jump Up, Dodge (2nd), Defensive Stance (2nd), Melee (2nd), Knowledge:Underworld (2nd)

2/3/35
So many visitors. I think Via was first, then Swift, then Damaria, then Sprend. No, wait, that's not right. They're all blurring together. It's high time I got out of here!

Via's visit was as perplexing as can be expected. Checking on my condition, trying to kill me, then totally misinterpreting my overtures of allegiance. She left in a huff.

Damaria stopped by to check on my loyalties, and assure me that this team was the right place for people like us. I told her that I had placed my trust in her.

Swift stopped by to see how my feelings towards his family had changed. (Geez, did I take out an ad saying “Traitor for Sale” or something? Just because I'm a spy doesn't mean I'm fickle.) I told him that this team meant almost as much to me as my family. He responded with dramatic speech about how important this group was to him. At first I thought he was rebuffing me, but after a moment longer I understood. He was offering me a place among them. And a datachip. The datachip contained music; a kind of holo-mixtape. The liner notes said something about a Zeltron lute. It was the song he was playing when we first met. (Via is a Zeltron, isn't she? Geez, more games or what??)

Sprend stopped by with the Jedi guy. Can't remember what we talked about, but it was a nice gesture.

Merlyn has mothered me quite enough though. Time for me to get out of here and back to the Den. I've got work to do.